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BLACK DIRTY DEBUTANTES I DVD
New Machine
(1993, 2 hrs)
Stars: Diana Knight,
Janet Jacme, Sascha Chong, Jake Steed, Lana Sands, Ed Powers, Amber
Smith
Director: Ed Powers
Themes: hot
masturbation, anal sex, big butts, natural tits.
Rating: 9.5 out of
10
DVD Extras: Skip to
a scene
MR. WEB REVIEWS
TAKE:
It's 1993 and Ed
Powers is finally turning his Dirty Debutante camera lens to the sistas.
And it's about time. We get some not-so-funny one-liners by Ed, who's
hand is broken throughout shooting (a fact he tells the viewer about
3,002 times, including giving unwanted close-up glimpses of his swollen
fingers). But we also get to see Janet Jacme's first on-screen screw
(allegedly) and we see a young Lana Sands and a starlet who only made
one porn appearance, then 18-year-old Sascha Chong, simply a natural
wealth of sexiness....Another thing, the wife sat through this entire
video and, as Konnan of World Championship Wrestling is fond of saying,
we'll let her "speak on this."
This film, being made in 1993, doesn't offer much of a stellar transfer
to digital video but it is pretty decent, the audio isn't stellar
either. About the only feature you get is the ability to jump directly
to your scene, which beats VCR rewinding any day.
And if you've seen the DD series you know the drill: a series of
unconnected vignettes where Ed interviews, usually makes fun of and then
lets the girl do her thing: masturbate to what looks like a real orgasm
and then get boned out of her brain.
So we begin with 22-year-old Amber Smith, a 5-foot-7 slenderoni with
measurements of 32-24-33. She's tiny, yes. She wears a gold dress and
red shoes (losing some cool points for bad attire; Joan Rivers would
have a field day) and she's never done a porno.
Why is she choosing to start now? Well, she says "I want to broaden
my sexual horizons."
Only she doesn't wanna bone.
"I don't want to go that far," she says shyly.
OK, she says she doesn't usually masturbate much either, but she's cute,
has a big smile, and says although she's never done a woman, she's not
opposed to it (progress finally).
Now the interview, which isn't memorable to start with, goes on for too
long, and why is Ed constantly referring to that damn hand?
After the first time, we get it.
And we don't need to see him stick it in front of the camera while he's
behind it, so the darn thing is out of focus and appears bigger and
grosser than it really is.
Hey Ed, we want, as Morris Day said in "Purple Rain," to see
some asses wiggling.
Finally, Amber strips down, revealing the Kobe Tai nature of her tiny
figure. She looks like an 8th grade cheerleader sneaking off to the
bathroom to frig during the school dance. Oh you know, you get all
worked up grinding on each other dancing to "Let's Get It On,"
and have to let off steam? What? Never happened to you?
OK, bad personal story.
Well, Amber strips down and spreads her cooch out for us, and after Ed
makes stupid jokes about how her cooch is crooked and how Asian women's
cooches are crooked, too, we go to a fade out.
When we fade in, Amber is on her hands and knees, looking ready for
doggy penetration, only she's reached her left hand underneath herself
and is frigging. Barely. What else do you call it when a girl has the
fingertips of her middle and pointer fingers just inside herself and is
moving her body more than her hand?
Man, we're only in the first inning and I already want a replacement
pitcher.
So finally Amber lays back on her back and begins to frig a little
better, still without a lot of heat. Heck, she must not really frig a
lot, because this sure ain't convincing. At least her breathing gets
deep as her stroking finally, finally begins to get the better of her
frigidity.
She cums and tells Ed, in a whisper of a voice, "it's feeling
good." Ed closes in on her wet fingers, which emerge shiny and
glistening from her wet cooch looking like what yours would if you
dipped 'em in Vaseline.
Another fade out. We fade in and she's laying reverse from Ed, jacking
him off, and whoa, another quick fade out.
What's the dilly, Ed?
Well, we cut to Ed again discussing his damn hand, which he broke
falling out of the shower and hasn't had it properly attended to yet.
Apparently, the pain was too great to concentrate on Amber jacking him
to completion. So we're back, apparently at a later date (all have on
different clothes at least) and Ed has a soft cast on the hand.
Turns out, he's called in the "stunt dick," Jake Steed, only
Amber doesn't know what she's getting. So we fade out again.
We fade in and Amber has her eyes covered and is on her knees. Ed has
her spin around to face Steed, or more correctly Steed's hard dick,
which he is stroking like 3 inches from Amber's grill.
Amber removes her hands and opens her eyes to find this monstrosity
staring back at her. "It's huge,'' she says grabbing it and
pulling. "How big is it?"
We cut to Jake laying in bed on his back with Ed's thick glasses on.
Jake is now doing a bad Ed imitation, trying his best to be a true
"stunt dick" we guess. Amber begins to jerk Jake some more as
she scoots up to put her tiny tits in his face. Ed's camera backs away
to catch all of this nicely. Nearly 30 minutes in, BDD1, finally begins
to get some heat. But things will get so much better.
As she jacks Amber looks directly into Ed's camera and does an overdone
job of trying to sell how hot she is. No. 1, Jake's not really doing
anything to her, and No. 2, we're damn ready to see Jake do something to
her.
Sorry. Out of luck.
Remember, Amber doesn't wanna go the distance.
No, she jacks him hard with the right hand and gives the visual
impression that she's taking him into her mouth, which she places at the
top of her right hand. In truth, she's not doing it. And she's licking
her left hand, which is also on Jake's shaft and balls. The visual tease
is affecting Jake, who's getting closer to completion and breathing
heavy enough that you think he needs a tank of o2.
"I want to cum on your face," Jake says as he gets ready.
Rather surprisingly, Amber inches closer and takes a full cum bath all
over her face and smiles while she gets it.
Now, while Amber didn't do penetration, of any kind, we move into our
second scene and Dianna Knight is sucking Randy West's johnson like
there's no tomorrow. He is laying back and she's got hands working and
her tongue working and boy does she look so nasty. She looks, really,
like that third grade English teacher you had who you just knew was hot
underneath those wire-rims and the pleated skirt that seemed to fit too
big. You knew she was hiding something.
That's Dianna. What a tart. She sucks balls and massages dicks like
she's rolling pizza, using both hands, rolling and kneeding West's
member. Then she jumps on it and rides it like a bronco and keeps
telling West, "I didn't get to let all my air out." She's
worried about a coochie fart (don't front fellas, you've heard them
before), but hell, we ain't. She's so aggressive, asking West, "Is
that tight enough for you?"
Damn near overcome -- and this is saying something for RANDY WEST -- our
hero responds, "oh yes, real fucking tight." You almost feel
like a true voyeur at this point. Give Ed credit, he may've started
slow, but things have heated up fast, fast, fast.
Our couple lets go with a lot of nasty conversation as they bone each
others brains out, which is rather a turn on for us, and she rides him,
takes him mish and then he gets into one of our favorite positions: she
lays flat on her stomach and he enters her from the rear, banging
against her bottom. Hard. As he works, Dianna tells Randy, "take
it! Take it!" And then Randy gets some anal lovin' in too before
cumming on her ass.
Fade out.
Next up is Ed again talking about that damn hand and sitting in front of
the Queen Of Porn, Janet Jacme. This is a young Janet, who laughs when
asked what her last name is, almost ashamed of its masturbatory
connotation.
Like Amber, Janet gets a surprise stud, one Ed promises she's seen in
magazines. Turns out Janet has a lot of sex and has a boyfriend named
"Mike" and she's not nervous about making this movie. "I
like to have sex and I like people to watch," she says.
She doesn't really know her measurements, saying she's 34 something, but
notes her tits are real and she doesn't do girls. OK, OK, just please
stand up in those jeans.
Ah, wish granted. Ed asks Janet to stand to show off her terrific ass.
She stands and spins and fellas, Levis never looked so good. Oh, does
this woman fill out some denim. And then she grabs the donkey and shakes
it and says you can't really see it through her pants.
We're like Ed, who says, "Oh yes you can."
Powers feels it and gropes it, even with the cast on, and then asks a
few dumb questions:
"Is your hair real?"
"Yes, all real."
"Are you all black," Ed asks and rubs her stomach.
"I guess so," he says looking at his fingers and seeing no
powder on the tips. "This doesn't come off."
Says Janet: "And it's not a tan either."
We'll forgive Ed these borderline comments. Why? Well, he gets Janet to
scoot back on the bed, strip down to a really nice bra and g-string and
spin around again, showing us all of her wonderful gift: that round
shaped onion. Ed walks over to inspect that ass again, almost like its
metal and he's a magnet. And who can blame him? Janet has one of the
most perfect sexual bodies ever caught on film.
So finally she leans back against the head of the bed and begins to
masturbate. She immediately makes eye contact with the camera and has
this, well, guttural look on her face, almost to say, "I want you.
Come have me. Fuck me now."
She goes to her clit with one hand, then two, and rubs her tits and
looks at you, through you, as though you and Janet are the only two
people in the room until you realize you are watching a nearly
7-year-old movie in your living room and this girl is so good she's
about got you convinced.
She frigs for a long, loooooonnnngggg time before Ed comes over to feel
her up again, and her cooch is wet. She's gotten a good cum in. Then we
get a cut.
Next thing we see Janet is on her knees, her hands covering her eyes and
Steed is behind her, limp and waiting. Ed has her turn around and look
and as soon as she sees The Curved Monster, Janet just has one of these
wordless screams and seems so happy to be with a "celeb.''
She grabs Steed and pulls him and he takes about .08 seconds to get
hard. Ed swings behind Janet to grab a great shot of All That Ass as she
sucks the dick. Steed fucks her mouth like it was a cooch and Janet had,
even then, already mastered that sloppy, saliva-laden head technique
that made her famous.
Then we cut to him laying on the bed as she continues to suck him off
while on the bed on her knees. Ed again goes behind Jacme, filling up
the screen with this perfect ass as Steed fingers her cooch from
underneath. Ladies and gentlemen, this is a killer shot. A clip and
save, if you will.
Finally she jumps on him and rides, slamming down in one quick stroke.
Immediately she goes to screaming and since no one knew this was her
thing, it was shocking, and her eyes got watery from the effort and the
feeling and she's banging harder and harder and harder until she cums
madly, screaming like a banshee and jumps - literally -- off the dick
and rolls onto the floor.
"I need a minute please," she says rolling into the fetal
position and smiling from the cum. She's apparently still in the throes
of ectasy. Jake and Ed aren't sure what to do. Ed asks if she's hurt.
Jake has this look like, "I did that?"
After a few minutes, Janet gets back on the bed and asks Steed to
"just hold me." He does and it's right here that you know it's
real. But Jake can't keep his hands off that ass. It's that juicy and
that inviting and before you know it, he's got Janet in the mish and is
banging her pussy until the juices are evident. And Jake keeps going and
going until he delivers a perfect cum shot....right in her navel.
Ah.....damn.
Next up is one of the most sexual performers we've ever seen. Too bad
18-year-old Sascha Chong never showed up in a blue movie again.
She plans, like Amber, to not go all the way and she wears a oversized
blue sweatsuit and athletic socks, thick and white. Ed gets her out of
those and she tells him she's part Japanese (father) and part black
(mom).
She strips to a gold bra top and black panties and it's here that the
wife makes her first comment, still admittedly a little in awe of
Jacme's performance.
"Why doesn't she wear matching underwear?" the wife asks.
"Don't you think that's tacky?"
Um, we didn't say it, but we're too busy looking at Sascha's absolutely
perfectly hanging tits and sweet ass through her g-string to notice the
colors aren't going together.
Ed is, too. He goes right over and kisses her ass and licks her anus.
This obviously turns on Sascha, who is so playful. She's like the nice
girl who's so nasty in private. Ed keeps licking ass and finally Sascha
decides to go the distance. Ed happily announces this via script on the
screen before she begins one of the most memorable frigs we've seen.
She noticeably gets goosebumps and you can see the white cum in her
cooch and the girl starts grabbing her thighs, squeezing them after
every stroke, saying "it's...giving....me....chills."
Us, too, honey.
And, boy, does she cum. Her face contorts, her body contorts, the wife's
face turns sideways as if she's incredulous. "I think that one was
real," the wife finally says.
And she is so wet, especially after Ed goes right in, immediately after
Sash's frig-gasm, and eats her out from behind.
We cut to her laying opposite of him facing in a different direction.
She's pinching his nipples and jacking him off and one of her breasts is
pressing against his thigh, making it look bigger. Finally Ed lines up
an awful good looking doggy style position that has Sascha grunting at
first then wailing. But, alas, Ed isn't the most adorable guy to watch.
He's pale. OK, maybe pale doesn't do this justice.
Ed looks like....well, Ed looks like Casper the Ghost after three months
indoors.
He and Dom DeLouise probably share the same diet and the same fat cells
count.
Says the wife: "Look at him! He's all flat and flabby. He looks
gross. To me this is a film person who does this so he can have sex with
women."
Well, there are worse things. And by now, Ed, flabby or not, is working
Sascha into a serious doggy style lather. Point of fact: he's tearing up
that ass, and she's banging back against him and she gets really, really
loud before he pulls out and cums in her open waiting mouth.
But Ed's not done. We cut to him with her in the "buck"
position -- probably at least 20 minutes after the first cum -- and his
hair is now going in eight different directions. Right now, Ed looks
like an overweight Mickey Rourke trying to work Kim Basinger with some
refrigerated fruit. Point of fact II: his pale body is such a turnoff,
but the way he's working Sascha is such a turn-on. She's just too much.
She's cum and gone to fuck heaven, fans, and Ed gets another load off, a
very slight one (making us believe this was shot mere minutes after the
first one).
Next up is Lana Sands, at 21. She's calling herself Leisha Cheng Mai and
she's just hit legal drinking age. "I'm still a baby," she
says.
The wife immediately says "she's ugly," and truth is, Lana's
hair is frizzy, her makeup is horrible and her teeth need a lot of work.
This is not the gorgeous Lana of later years.
Lana also says her measurements are 34-25-36 at 5-61/2. Well Lana is
severely flat-chested but makes up with a killer ass, but a 34 she'll
never be without plastic sur-ge-ry (just to make a rhyme, fellas).
Lana stands in her jeans and spins to show off her butt. Ed is taken by
her youthful looks and rubs her hands with his and rubs her cheeks, her
ears and Lana seems to enjoy this attention. She sucks his fingers and
he makes the following comment: "What makes a woman do something
with a man like me?"
The wife laughs. Lana doesn't answer. She only strips and masturbates,
revealing an absolutely perfect set of legs. And she's got good
technique, her body jerking in convulsive like movements when she
reaches the O. Then she turns over, putting her ass in the camera and
fingers her anus.
And here comes Ed. He's licking ass and she rolls over and frigs some
more. Ed eats her now and you can even hear the clicking of the ceiling
fan overhead (hey realism in porn and no soundtrack to drown it out. We
like it).
She sucks Ed off and takes him mish with her legs up (buck position) and
then she takes doggy and rear anal, even though it seems to hurt a
little. Back in the buck anal, Ed cums and moves away so Lana can do a
quick kegel exercise, make her pussy "fart" and expel some
real cum juices.
Nice.
So we cut back to Sascha, who Ed cannot get enough of (us either). She's
laying at the base of his groin, jerking him off and tit fucking him. Ed
cums in her hand and says he wanted to cum in her face. No prob. Sash
just rubs her hands all over her face.
This kind of fun, rambunctious attitude is needed more in porn, and it's
because of it that Sash and Janet make this movie memorable, a must
have.
You won't find two better asses to look at.
Copyright ©
September 1999 Mr. Web Review
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